Making Plans

Somewhere along the lines, I heard what I think is a great piece of dating advice.
Never make plans for the future that are further in the future than your past together.

In other words, if you’ve been dating for a week, don’t make plans past next week. If you’ve been dating for three months, don’t make plans more than 3 months in the future.

Its a great rule of thumb to keep yourselves from getting too far ahead of yourselves, and I think it makes you less likely to buy that plane ticket to Thailand that you might regret after you learn more about the person you’re dating. It also keeps you from freaking the other person out with stuff that isn;’t first date material – i.e. until you’ve actually raised a child and sent him off to college, don’t talk about taking your grandkids to Disney. I’ve never seen anyone go that far, but I have known people to get way ahead of themselves.

Relax, enjoy the natural progression of things.

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4 Responses to “Making Plans”

  1. datingintheoc Says:

    Oh, man. So today’s amazing first date? The one I was nervous to go on and now can’t stop thinking about…I’m not allowed to think all the way into January. That’s. So. Limiting. Triple Grrr….

  2. Webmaster Says:

    Sounds like a special guy… =) Don’t scare him off! I’m kidding of course. I know that sometimes if I go out with someone that I’m into I play the whole relationship out in my head. From the subsequent first few dates to old age. I know, it’s weird. It’s just when I do that I also get in the habit of thinking about things to do down the road, sometimes too far down the road. I have to purposely stop myself…

  3. datingintheoc Says:

    Me? Scare a guy off with my charming intense intensity? Never! You want the truth? I bet you I’m not the only woman that imagines THE WEDDING on the first date. No, we don’t think about the reception but we do sit across from you and wonder if you are the husband type and if that tux we have in our brain is going to fit you. With some slight alterations it just might….

  4. thePete Says:

    It’s okay to day dream a little, I’m just saying don’t take action on things like renting out the reception hall and planning the honey moon before the newness of the relationship is over.

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